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Humour Articles

How To Survive a Dysfunctional Family
and Natural Disaster
All At The Same Time

If you really want to discover how dysfunctional your family is--- just have them all in a radius of twenty-five miles during a natural disaster—and see how they react. That’s what happened to me. As a humorist and reinvention expert, it’s my job, as difficult as it may be, when any disaster hits --- to use the power of humor to get through it...

You see, I recently reinvented myself (once again) and moved to South Florida. Two weeks there I run smack into WILMA the WORST Hurricane to hit three counties in over 50 years. Trees ripped from the ground… Roofs blown off… broken traffic lights swaying harmonious in the wind like they were a “Do-Wop” group.

I had one New York buddy actually call me during the escapade and ask me how it was (as if I was having a meal.) I responded, “You know, it’s a Hurricane. Lots of wind and hot air… the same I get from talking with you.”

My friend, you haven’t lived unless you’ve taken a cold shower every day, waited on line while FEMA gives ice and MRE food rations to you. The worst part? Not having any electricity for nine days. During this very stressful time, people actually envied the folks that had “it.” (electricity) “Did you hear that Murray in 12G has a generator?”

Folks were desperate. And when you heard a rumor of someone actually getting their power on, your mind raced like a fluttering rolodex at the possibilities. “Okay, do I show up on their door step?” “Do I bribe them?” ” Do I cry and plead to use their toilet?” On day two of Wilma an aunt from NY called me and confided in me as if she was Deep Throat in “Watergate.”

“Pssst… rumor has it that your Uncle Leon in Boyton Beach has electricity, BUT he doesn’t want anyone else to know, because he thinks you’ll all want to use his toilet.” CLICK DIAL TONE. That’s the way it is in my family. No good-byes, they just hang up.

Like an episode out of “Seinfeld” I envisioned the conversation going like this with my Uncle.

Me: Uncle Leon?

Leon: (suspicious) Who is this?

Me: Your nephew Peter. I know it’s been about 15 years… how are you?

Leon: (crotchety and not buying it) Yeah, Yeah. I’m fine. Cut to the chase so you can call me out of the blue--- in another 15 years.

Me: Okay. I heard you have uh… electricity.

Leon: (covering) Nope. Got Nothing… Nada… Nunca!

Me: You know I live down here now… and—

SFX: We hear a blender in the background

Me: Say is that a blender?

Leon: (covering) Blender? No! It’s your Aunt Joan… hacker’s cough. Yeah, that’s it! Poor woman’s got lungs like a Kentucky Coal Miner

Joan YELLS from another room, clear as a bell

Joan: LEON! HURRY UP WITH THE DACQUIRIES; THE GOLDSCHMIDTS ARE STARTING TO DEHYDRATE!

Leon: Listen— Peter is it? We’re all suffering here. There’s a news black out, I don’t even know what day it is…

SFX Announcer’s voice: (James Earl Jones) This is CNN!

ME: You’re holding out on us! You… you… have power!”

SFX: Santana’s “Oye Coma Va” plays over the phone

ME: … and that’s a stereo!

Leon: No, no! Carlos Santana is actually here playing for us. His mother lives across the hall. Listen, you moocher… We have NO electricity and you can’t prove we do… and even if we did, you couldn’t use my toilet. I gotta go. Oh, tell my sister to mind her own business and inform your father, that louse, that he still owes me that money! (beat; then) Good hearing from you. Ba-bye!

Click Dial Tone!

So there you have it. I learned that dysfunction and disaster sometimes goes hand in hand. And that you’re entitled to feel angry, royally pissed and a conundrum (I love that word, barely know what it means, but it seems right) of other feelings that are creeping into your being. As long as you’re not injured during the calamity and you realize “it is, what it is” – the best way to get through something of this calamity, and I’m talking over 120 mile per hour wind calamity…  is to get some distance – and find (as difficult as might be) the humor. And here’s the part that hopefully you’ll find amusing, that fictitious conversation would be pretty close to the one that I’d really have with him.

The truth is always funnier than anything we can make up. Now, if you’ll excuse me, the power is on in my condo and I’d like to take a hot shower before the next natural disaster hits Florida.

Peter J. Fogel is our resident humorist and reinvention forum leader who is also the author of the book, “If Not Now… Then When? Stories and Strategies of People Over 40 Who Have Successfully Reinvented Themselves. Sign up for his Reinvent This! Ezine and receive for FREE his Ultimate Reinvention Quiz e-book. www,reinventyourselfnow.com

Pssst! Here’s The Secret To
Why We Laugh!

I think we can all agree that humor is subjective. (And if you don’t agree your decision is still subjective, correct?)

What is funny to one person might be boring and insulting to the next. It all has to do with our background and experience. What a twenty-two year old male college student might find amusing will undoubtedly be different than what a retired seventy five year old gynecologist from Dearborn, Michigan who lives in Florida will laugh at.

A retired gynecologist should guffaw at: medical procedures, cholesterol, coupons at early-bird dinners, prostate problems. (Although prostates can be a “touchy” subject—and I mean that literally and figuratively.)

A college student will relate to: trying to get sex, getting drunk, getting more drunk, passing out from alcohol… and then try getting more sex, again. Although mention Viagra and the two will both probably laugh. Naturally, you think,” But the doc was a twenty-five college student once, right? Yes, but that was during the Truman administration and when gas was a nickel a gallon.

People and their sensibilities change over time. I know mine has. That is why humorists and comedians get the big bucks. Somehow we have to find the common ground that the majority of our audience can appreciate, enjoy—and hopefully learn from. Humor when used effectively is indeed the great “equalizer.” It represents the human condition. (Notice that the first three letters of human and humor are h-u-m. I know, pointless trivia—my sentiments exactly.)

BUT According to Psychologist Keith-Spiegel, there are eight major theories of what we will laugh at. But before we examine this, let’s look at the lunacy of this. I never heard of Keith-Spiegel, I am quoting this source from another source… and the person before me did the same thing.

Society is impressed with credentials. We assume that a psychologist’s theory, just because he has a “diploma” that hangs in the den or his office, is of great importance to us.

I invite you to www.reinventyourselfnow.com and sign up for my Reinvent This! E-zine and get the Ultimate Reinvention Quiz E-book.
Peter "the Humorator" Fogel

How Humor Can Heal You Through the Tough Times

It was 1990 and I was back in NYC from LA dealing with my terminally ill mother in Cedar Sinai Hospital. Three years earlier she was diagnosed with colon cancer. As you might have experienced yourself, back in those days the dreaded chemo was really the only treatment available. She put up the good fight, but by this juncture it had spread to the liver and lymph nodes. Mom was losing the battle and she was in and out of a coma.

Ever so often she would moan, “Enough!”

I had dealt with the inevitable and knew her time would come soon and that Mom would finally have her peace. It’s always difficult to deal with the impending death of a parent (or any loved one) especially when you’ve only had them for thirty-two years.

Take Two Aspirin & Laugggggggggh!

I would spend eight hour days at the hospital by my mom’s bedside and at night I’d go to a comedy club down the block and do a spot. How you’re probably asking could I do that? How could I just go and make people laugh like that?

And my reply would be how I could not? Humor heals and I knew it would be the only thing that could get me through this stressful time. For thirty minutes, while on stage, time literally stood still for me as I blocked out what was happening to my mother only blocks away. If you were to talk to me that night in the club you wouldn’t even know what I was going through earlier in the evening.

Making people laugh, seeing the joy on their faces, was the best prescription for me. I didn’t need valium or alcohol to kill my pain. Just laughter. Getting off stage I felt a real release. And you can do the same thing. If you’re going through a Difficult time--- then you should humor as a way to “give yourself a much needed break.”

The mourning you have to go through, the self-flagellation you might be putting Yourself through, and the problems that are mounting will be still be there for you when you get back… but using humor affectively will give you a mini-vacation.

Rent a hysterical movie…. Listen to your favorite comedian’s cd… read a humorous book… (Dave Barry?) go to a comedy club and see a show that night. Turn on the TV and watch a rerun of “Seinfeld” (which seems to be on 24/7 these days.)

If you’re dealing with a terminally ill loved on… close your eyes and envision a happy and hysterically funny time you both spent together. And remember what the late, great Victor Borge would always say, “Laughter is the closest distance between two people.”

Hopefully, for just a few moments, you’ll get some distance from your pain and laugh… and once you do--- you’ll release the endorphins in your brain, get that “natural high” and give yourself the much needed respite that you truly deserve. They say love conquers all. (Now, I don’t know who ‘they is’—but ‘they’ always seem to have all the answers) Well, I believe humor heals all. Try it… it really
works!

I invite you to www.reinventyourselfnow.com and sign up for my Reinvent This! E-zine and get the Ultimate Reinvention Quiz E-book.
Peter "the Humorator" Fogel

Our Peter Fogel - The Humorator - Welcomes Forum Members :)

~~~~~~~~~~~

WELCOME TO THE REINVENTION FORUM

"where you can FINALLY be the person you've always wanted to be."

SMACK! Ouch! Did that hurt or what? I'm talking about what happened in the year 2000. The stock market threw cold water on baby boomers across the globe squashing their dreams of a pain free - easy- as-it-goes retirement.

And here's a sobering..

FACT! According to an Associated Press article, Merrill Lynch took a poll of 3,400 baby boomers and guess what? Nearly 77 percent of them said that despite retirement looming (and soaring home prices) they will work in some capacity in a second career and that includes 13 percent who stated they intended to start their own business.
Yep! This "ain't your dad's give-me-that-gold watch retirement," that's for sure.

So now you're wondering, what are these boomers doing with themselves? Answer: A LOT! They're "reinventing" their careers and lives and exploring avenues they never thought existed.

I know. I'm one of them.

Hi, I'm Peter "the Humorator" Fogel, moderator of the reinvention forum and author of the critically acclaimed book, "If Now Now. Then When? Stories and Strategies of People Over 40 Who Have Successfully Reinvented Themselves." ( www.reinventyourselfnow.com )

Do You Know Who I Am? Well, I Made You Laugh For Over 25 Years

And before that I was a late night television comedian who appeared on such comedy shows such as Evening At The Improv, Carolines Comedy Hour, HBO's Comedy Central. I'm pretty sure you saw me . you just didn't know my name.

I also made studio audiences laugh on such programs as Married With Children, The Mommies, Howie Mandel Show, Hope and Faith, and Whoopi w/ Whoopi Goldberg.

I've worked along side some of your favorite stars: Jon Stewart, Ray Romano, Dennis Leary- and improvised on stage with Robin Williams. I had a very cool and rewarding career. and then it happened. .possibly the same thing that's happened to you.

1) I got older...and 2) my market changed. TWO very important things that can alter any person's life - (no matter how much denial one is in.) You see. My comedic and writing talents were improving year in and year out, but my audiences were getting younger. (these darn kids today, right?) Not to mention that the club circuit was drying up and the money didn't pay nearly as much as it used to.

I didn't want to end up being funny at night and during the day saying, "Say, for 49 cents more you can super size those fries, Sparky!"

I've Reinvented Myself And Now Baby Boomers United Wants to Help You Do The Same!

That's when I made the choice to reinvent myself into an advertising copywriter, speaker and now reinvention expert. I have a more rewarding career - the second time around-then I ever had in show business. My speaking and copy writing services are in demand, I'm making my own hours, answering to no one, earning what I am truly worth--- but MOST of all making a difference in people's lives like yourself.

I'm finally doing what I want to do . on my terms. BUT what about you?

And that my friend is the purpose of the Baby Boomers United Reinvention Forum: It's goal is to bring you tips, trick, ideas - products and services - along with cutting edge information from other peak performing experts that can make YOUR reinvention what YOU want it to be. (As well as showing you how to LAUGH as you over come the trials and tribulations that life throws you.)

So let me ask you? Have you been downsized at work. has your talents been outsourced to some Third World Country? Is your health and the quality of your life being affected by WHAT YOU DO FOR A LIVING? Then my former earth shoe, Rolling Stones, Neil Diamond, Lava lamp loving baby boomer - this forum is for you. But first, let me ask:

Could This Be You!?

Dale Vnuk, 47. This boomer for over 25 years was doing the same thing and dealing with same b.s. every day at work which included grousing from co-workers. Eventually Dale had finally HAD IT! He did pulled a 360 (ready for this?) and went from airline mechanic to water garden builder. (Hey, I went from comedian to copywriter-so the sky's the limit, right?)

This union man decided that at his age it was time to do something... or just sit there and be miserable. And so he ventured into a whole new career!

Or how about Barbara Harris ? This lady started a whole new career as a fashion designer and she did it in her mid-50's. But she just didn't do it over night. She had a plan in place. This entrepreneurial lady took early "corporate" retirement from G.E. as a "corporate" manager. Along with her notebook full of sketches she started her business in Connecticut and now has a growing operation in NY's Garment District!

If boomers like Barbara and Dale can do it. so can you. And you can do with the Reinvention Forum where other like minded folks-just like you, along with many experts (who know what the needs of the boomers are) WILL assist you in your goals of reinvention.

Make no mistake: This site is for you! I want to hear your stories, what your obstacles are and along with other nostalgic boomers who have reached their goals of reinvention. we're going to give you the tools to show you how to find balance and fulfillment so you can present to the world a brand, spanking new YOU! (Yeah, baby!)

I'll even pull in the some favors from some show business folks and do interviews with some of your favorite recording artists. actors. (even top gun businessmen) to see what THEY'RE secrets of success are, so you can enjoy the unity of mind, body and spirit. Keep coming back to Baby Boomers United for updates. tell us what we can do to help you. and we surely will.

So buckle your seat belt and get ready for a fun ride. This is YOUR time now!

Listen, if Mick Jagger who legally can get a senior citizens discount at CVS Drugs can still rock n' roll, well, so can you.

First stop: go to www.reinventyourselfnow.com and sign up for my Reinvent This! E-zine and get the Ultimate Reinvention Quiz E-book.
Peter "the Humorator" Fogel

JBCR Virtual Solutions

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